Believe Her! She's Trying to Save Your Life!
This subject needs to be addressed and talked about.
There is a fine line between an ex that is not quiet over the relationship and an ex trying to prevent the next victim. Be mindful of what is being said to you by that ex, the context, and the situation. If the ex is trying to be helpful, showing you proof of abuse, believe it. She is probably trying to save your life.
There are times when you can be faced with an ex that is not over the relationship. Take a step back and remember when your heart was last broken and how it made you feel. Is it right? No, but take it with grace because that person is genuinely in pain. How soon is the new love interest trying to move on with you? Is it a bit soon? Did they take time to heal themselves or are you going to be a rebound? These are things to keep in mind as you take those next steps.
Most importantly, what is it that you want in life? Do you just want someone to have fun and pass the time with? Or are you wanting that long-term, for life, kinda love?
Now if you are getting messages from the ex or even their friends letting you know about any abuse- BELIEVE THEM! Why would they take the time out of their day, to bring up wounds that probably still affect them? Most victims of abuse sadly developed some sort of anxiety disorder and even PTSD from the situation. Why on Earth would they jeopardize their mental health to let you know what that person did? They wouldn’t- they are just trying to protect your life. If you still have doubts, whether this person is telling the truth, ask for some type of proof. Nine times out of ten, they have tons of pictures, videos, and police reports they can send to back up the claims.
I know that dating in todays filtered social media world sucks. It is exhausting, but please do not put your life in danger because of it. No, you will NOT be the person to change them. They do not change. It is not that your love isn’t good enough, it is all on them. Trust your gut when it comes too this.
Listen to me here, even if you are just looking for some fun, a little fling, chose someone else. The mind games and their hold will affect you tremendously. They will not let you go, even if they agreed to just having fun. Slowly, they will wear you down. Please, just walk away now because it will get to a point where you can’t. Where leaving, could put your life in danger.
I do not know when, or how, women had to bend their standards this low to try and find love. Keep those standards higher than your heels ladies! You deserve everything that you want, and you will find that. Give it time. So, if you get a random warning, believe whoever is telling it. Remember your worth and walk away love!
This is to you H, love you lady!